In all raw honesty, dancing has never been a very active part of my life, nor I intended for it to be..
The kind of dancing widely available while growing up just did not resonate with me.
Only when I slightly numbed my emotions I could scratch the surface of what it was suppose to feel like.
I really believe that is one of the reasons alcohol and club dancing go so well together..
to numb our deepest emotions so that when we stay at the surface, moving our heads around feeling very little beneath it, we tell ourselves (and others) we are having fun.
I experienced some night dancing at the clubs while teenager but very strikingly these events seemed disconnected from my inner knowing that it was not the path I wanted to truly live in.
Alcohol and competitive flirting was the thing everyone had on their minds and I was kind of unconsciously looking for a place, in me, with some kind of meaning, some kind of connection that would lead to any sort of missing piece on my soul yearning for answers..
I felt kind of embarrassment and shame while being watched with competitive eyes like prey animals in the wild, that was what literally most of us was growing up to be, learning to shield any signs of vulnerability and to show only animal instincts.
At least that was the teaching that everyone around us was mirroring at the time and we did our best to follow them, despite the huge hole in our existence shouting of hunger for life.
Fast forwarding many years, it was only when, like all best things in life, unexpectedly, a friend invited me to go on a Biodanza open day class is where I truly found the lost connection, the broken link between Men and ancestral deeply rooted Dance.
One particularly striking moment was definitely the final 5 to 10 minutes of the session where we should totally follow our intuition and guided only by the sound playing in background, act like a tree that would slowly root itself into the ground and then allow to kind of dismantle ourselves into the floor..
I was ready to fully surrender to it.
As this was at a time when I have been carving for a while, a huge life changing trail..
And through that blissful surrender, I literally traveled away from my physical body into a place I cannot describe.
However, it was only afterwards, when I greeted and thanked everyone present and left the place going home, that it wholeheartedly touched me and made me feel emotions that were still being processed in the background and hidden by some layers of the unveiling process that I was in.
This video that I share with you today brought me back some of those raw emotions and memories, and reminded me that we are all eMotion to the core of our being.
In the depths of me
is where I am truly Free
#Obrigado #SaraBaga #AnaFilipe
Video produced by Sara Baga and Gonçalo Sarmento, performed by Ana Filipe